"Only" a Mother

Ten years ago. . . . .

You asked what I have done to promote pro-life so that you may perhaps learn what more you could do..

I am 49 years along in my life. Ever since I can remember I have wanted to be a mother. My dolls were “real” to me as I cuddled and cared for them.

Then I grew up and started to learn the ways of the “world.”  I was an honor student in high school, went to college and had a hard time determining what to major in, finally settling on a BS in Elementary education. I married, taught school for two years and had learned during those years that I was pretty smart, and what I wanted was what was right for me, that no one should tell me what to do with my life, or my body, or my fertility, or my faith..not my parents or my friends or my church or definitely not my husband..the woman liberated, I was!

But eventually, my desire to be a mother definitely overcame all the handicaps that I had self-imposed upon my life. I convinced my husband that it was time, after four years of marriage, to start a family. Partly, I wanted to quit my teaching position I held because of various conflicts, but mostly, I wanted a baby. Thus began the most intense years of my life.

For the next 25 years, I was either pregnant of nursing a child. We have six healthy children and three unborn because of miscarriage. What I have done to promote pro-life is:

1.  Change approximately 44,000 dirty diapers.

2.  Fill a full pew in church every Sunday

3.  Field an array of negative comments from “friends” and family that questioned our right to have such a large family

4.  Answered the question, “Don’t you know what causes that?” a million times, (to which the best response I ever heard was, “Yes, we know, and we enjoy it so much that we don’t intend to quit!”

5.  Giving our children siblings instead of things.

6.  Having a body full of stretch marks and sagging internal organs from being pregnant with 10 lb. boys and big girls, too.

7.  Staying home with all of them, not working for extra money, not having a career that is “worthwhile” in the eyes of the work world.

8.  Having no savings or retirement plan, except to rely on the daily providence of the Lord, because doctor bills, food, clothes, etc., for a family of eight is difficult on one income.

9.  Having a wonderful husband who works constantly to love and provide for us throught all of this, and having the respect and love of his wife and children.

10.  Growing to accept obedience and authority in my life.

11.  Donating time to my church community with gifts of music.

12.  Starting the Pratt For Life group with a small group of friends, organized many  fundraising activities to start a crisis pregnancy center, including a Concert For Life, the county fair booth, a float in the Miss Kansas Parade, the Life Chain

13.  Helped my husband with his Pro Life Yard Sign project, which we are currently attempting to sell, to encourage others to display in their front yard their statement of faith in life.  ( we still have some of these!!)

I guess what I am trying to point out is that mothers are on the front line of pro-life, because we give birth, and learn and grow along with our families in our knowledge of life and of the Giver of Life.

At one point in all of the above experiences, we went to Wichita to buy a vehicle. The summer of mercy, and we “happened to be” next door to Tiller’s clinic where all of you were probably picketing and being arrested. This was the first time in my life that the reality of abortion was visible to me. A week later I returned to Wichita to have some additional things done to the vehicle, and decided to stand with my children in front of Tiller’s. One of you approached me and said it was not safe to stand there with children because cars were known to drive on the sidewalks and aim at the protestors. So we left, but not before we saw pictures of aborted babies, which I had to explain to my little ones that people killed babies.

This began my more active participation in other pro-life activities, which you are all doing, as well. But only after my major role as a mother had been developed and my children were nurtured. A time for everything.

I do pray for all of you who are out in the streets and the legislature and the voting booths, etc. and for all those who are still creating life in their families. All of us are needed to defend life. No matter if we are Democrat, Republican, conservative, liberal, whatever. When I was mothering I really didn’t have time to worry about all of these categories of belief. I lived one day at a time, trusting that what I did for my children would eventually impact them enough to reunite us in Heaven. My sole purpose for co-creating new life was to give them back to God. I still pray for that glad reunion.

Thanks for reading all of this!! Patrice Egging, mother, wife, child of God

This was written in 1999. I can add a few items to the list.

We have nine grandchildren added to the family, 2 son-in-laws and 2 daughter-in-laws.

I had a part in founding a crisis pregnancy center and served as a board member and the director.

The music ministry seems to be merging with the pro-life ministry as I am allowing the Lord to open doors.

There are still diapers to change, babies to bounce.

Many of my former clients from the center greet me when I see them. They seem happy.

God is good.